9 down, 3 to go!

sooo close to the finish line! it won't come a day too soon, that's for sure.

yesterday was actually a fairly eventful day. i saw my oncologist to have the big discussion about continuing with the bleo. he said while my lung function dropped a bit, it's still where it was when we started (it had increased in the middle), and my lungs looked fine on the chest x-ray and sounded fine, too. he also said he doesn't think my symptoms are consistent with what they see with lung toxicity from the bleo. so, based on all that his vote was to keep the drug in for now and have the same discussion again before every treatment from here on out. basically, he said he doesn't think dropping it would be the reason for treatment failure (which he doesn't expect to happen anyways, but we always have to consider it), especially since i'll be getting radiation, but he doesn't want to drop a potentially curative drug from the regimen without good reason. he told me it was my choice, but i asked him to make the decision.... my fear is less rational than his very thorough evaluation and years of experience. he took my concern very, very seriously and so i feel very, very confident in his advice. he's also made it quite clear from the beginning that he cares a lot about my future, and i know he would never make a decision that he knows isn't the best one. no one can totally predict how any of this will go, but that's just cancer...

during treatment i got to meet with the oncology dietician. she's one of the coolest people you could ever meet. and, she's a total health nut like i am, so it's a lot of fun to pick her brain on things. we chatted for a while about things i can eat to get through the rest of treatment, which is super helpful since i've started to run out of ideas of semi-nutritious but bland foods to eat when i don't feel well. but, most of all, it was just really fun to catch up with her. treatment went well until i got some serious chills at the very end. not so sure what that was about, but they kept me for a little while after i was done to make sure it stopped. i think i've just had chemical overload, and on top of whatever virus is lingering in me from that cold i had it just was too much.

and, i saved the best for last. my oncologist showed me the chest x-ray i had last week and compared it to the first one. on the first x-ray (pre-treatment) the mass was covering the entire lower half of my right lung field. the most recent x-ray, as my oncologist says, is still "a little abnormal", but you can see my entire lung field, and the mass is just a little bump on the right of my mid-line. sure, it's a "little abnormal", but i could have that scar tissue forever...and, it's a significant decrease in size...a very, very good thing!

so, all in all...just to be able to see the improvement since when we first started, and to know i'm so close to the end makes it much easier to just tough it out. i feel so fortunate that at the end of all this i'm likely to do very well. i've got lots of life left in me to live...and i plan to keep living it all.